My mother sent me these socks, which she bought when on holiday on Mallorca.

I am particularly intrigued by the pig thing on the left.

From the Caledonian Mercury, 18th March 1755:

"Yesterday a Person of Distinction gave a great Entertainment, at which a young Bear, which had been kept on Bread and Milk and Sugar..."

What do you think comes next?





Better than the pig that pigged a litter of seven?

I've just received the programme for the conference in Munich that I'm giving a paper at. Not only is the conference scary in itself (relatively big, 20 min papers followed by 25 mins discussion), but I found out that both of my undergrad supervisors are giving papers. I respect these people a lot. It's one thing messing up in front of random strangers, but disappointing them would be awful...



Also see http://www.englische-romantik.de/, where details of the conference can be found.

I haven't written in here in a really long time.

I have moved into the new office. I love the new building, despite the University's/English Department's insane Health and Safety policies. So far it's been really lovely. I've met lots of new people (and, more importantly, I still see them regularly. Not just once at the department party and then never again). I'm being productive. Sort of. I actually like coming to the office now.

The boy's and my birthday(s) passed quietly. We went to Edinburgh for my birthday. Spent hours at the National Gallery and did a wee bit of shopping. We had a birthday party a week later, which was fun and vaguely civilised with lots of really yummy food. And then this week was the boy's birthday, where we also didn't do much. But he got two days, because I got two days too. Sarah and I devised a treasure hunt for his presents, which took him a good three hours to complete. All within in the flat. Great fun.

I'm in Berlin. I'm only midly excited about Berlin - I've been before, it's such a large city, people tend to be really unfriendly, it's dirty and graffitied - but so far I've enjoyed myself. My friend Kerstin lives right in the centre of town, 2 mins walk from the Alexanderplatz station, which is where *every* train/tram/underground leaves from. Brilliant. So far it's been really hot - it's 9.15pm and it's still 25° out there!

Today we went to a couple of pubs - a fake Irish one and a fake Cologne one - and went for a walk. Kerstin had to go to work at 6 (she's a part-time KP/waitress in the holidays) so I'm all by myself. Well, by myself and with her flatmate, who is ill and has gone to bed. I've met her flatmate before, they were friends in Bonn, so it was nice to catch up with her, too. I've been reading "The Antiquary" tonight. Lots of exciting Macpherson mentions. Almost done with it. Will finish it tonight. Kerstin has to work Wednesday night as well and I'm hoping to get some thesising done. Would be nice.

An old friend from school has joined facebook. She is doing a PhD in Sheffield, in some practical subject (Geography), and I hadn't heard from her in ages. I'm excited that she's on facebook!

I can see the lit-up old 'Fernsehturm' from Kerstin's bedroom window. Very exciting. I don't seem to be able to upload a photo of it - goole 'Berlin Fernsehturm' and look at the pictures, it's rather pretty. In a city sort of way.

I'm still at home. Well, at my parents' house. I'm starting to think of St Ands as home. And I miss the boy. Yes, pathetic.

I've had a good week. I got to spend lots of time with my Mum and grandparents, and I've seen lots of my Dad. I seem to see more of him whenever he is in hospital, odd. He's fine - in pain, but well enough for me to leave tomorrow. I'm off to Berlin for a week. I'm not terribly excited about Berlin. I've been 6 or 7 times before and I don't really like it. I'm only going because my friend Kerstin happens to live there. We intend to spend the week doing absolutely nothing. Well, maybe knitting. And drinking, lots of drinking. And possibly going to the theatre once. And maybe one museum. And perhaps a tiny bit of shopping. But nothing else. I intend to sleep a lot.

I went to a wedding yesterday. My friend Anke, whom I properly got to know at university but met in 1999, when I was preparing for my year abroad. She's spent the previous year in the same city that I was going to. It was a nice wedding. Lovely dress, lovely groom, weird evangelical service. Happy clappy and bible bashy. With a band. And the sermon lasted for about 45 mins. Too long. Lovely dress though. I shall post a picture when I'm back home. I didn't know anyone (apart from the bride) but I had arranged to get a lift from one of her friends who lives virtually round the corner from my parents (read next town along). We got on well and I met more of Anke's school friends who were all really nice. Apart from one girl who was there with her boyfriend. Apparently they've been going out forever and everyone thought they'd be getting married next. They're not. Not ever, according to the boyfriend. Fun.

I want to go home.

I'm in Germany. In fact, I'm in Bonn. I spent most of yesterday afternoon photocopying a 4 vol. Ossian book that I've only managed to find at the BL, not the NLS. Unexplicately, Bonn holds it. Odd.

Today is shopping day. I need shoes for the wedding on Saturday and the wedding in Wales in September. I also need a pair of Jeans. And stuff, more stuff.

We watched a thing on TV last night about poor families in Europe. A German one had nothing - except a sofa, a mattress, and camping chair, a small side table, a jar of Nutella and some bread. Apparently they couldn't even afford pots (the programme went on and on about this). Yet the rent was paid for, and the woman ended up with 400+ Euros for her and her little daughter. Surely one can afford pot(s) with that? Also, there was a family from Denmark: single mother, 13 children, 9 dogs, 20 birds, 2 horses. Out of those 13, 8 kids live at home. The oldest is 28. The woman was 49 when she had her last child. And a family in Englandshire. Who live off income support with 5 kids and 2 dogs. Who had so many toys in their house that you literally couldn't see the furniture. Who started buying Christmas presents in August, so they would have enough come December. Enough being 12 (!) presents for each kid, plus a 'real' present each. WTF?

It's warm here. And it gets dark really early, around 9. V. strange. What is this 'summer' thing you keep telling me about?

I cracked the 8000 mark last night! I think I might get the chapter up to 10000, that would be nice. I intend to finish the first draft today and then revise it tomorrow. I also have to check some details, but that shouldn't take too long. Hopefully I'll be able to hand it in on Friday, but I might have to get the boy to hand it in on Monday instead.

In other news, my Dad is back in hospital. Same procedure as back in February, only on his legs and belly this time. They couldn't do what they wanted to do yesterday, so he's now waiting for another appointment, hopefully soon. They told him he would probably lose one of his legs if he didn't get it sorted asap...

At least I'm going home soon so I can spend some time with him (and my Mum).

I got one of the library jobs (not one they advertised though): Term-time only, Sat 1-5, Sun 1-7, plus as much shelving as I want (term-time AND vacation) to make up 20 hours!!!!

Am now on just over 5000 words. Phew. Would have written more but I had to go to the NLS on Thurday and to Aberdeen on Friday, which meant lots of reading but not a lot of writing.
Edinburgh was fun, as always, despite the pamphlet-pushing fringers out on the Royal Mile. They annoyed me rather. I went with Laura and Sarah, and we had lunch together, and caught both trains together, great fun. Most of the stuff I looked at was useful!
Aberdeen, on the other hand, is a horrible city. Not only its well-documented grey-ness, also the stupid having to take a bus to the Special Collections department was somewhat annoying. The Special Collections library is quite small and terribly understaffed, so that whenever I was done with an item the librarian had to lock up the place to fetch another one. I had about 20 on the list, and got through 10. Mainly due to the fact that I had to wait for about 20 minutes between items for her to find time to go and fetch the next one. She was very nice and helpful, however, and I hope I didn't annoy her too much. I had lunch - a sandwich from the only shop I could find; the only veggie one they had - and I sat down to eat it outside, on a little wall by the chapel. I was taking a sip from my bottle of water after I had finished half of the sandwich when a seagull landed on the wall, walked up to me, and stole the second half of the sandwich. A SEAGULL STOLE MY LUNCH. I was not impressed, stupid beast. I told the librarian and she said 'it happens, they do that sometimes'. Seriously?!

Have written 1500 words today, most of which aren't that bad. So much for being lazy.

I've had an exciting two weeks. Visitors! Fist cool2hate, and then oxoniana. Both of them only stayed for a couple of days, way too short if you ask me. cool2hate and I explored St Ands - the weather was lovely, good enough for a bbq on East Sands and the most amazing sunset ever! oxoniana geekily explored the Cathedral and Castle - in all her time here, she'd never been up St Rule's tower! It was so lovely to see them both - I feel like we've been friends forever, yet I'd never met cool2hate personally and had only seen oxoniana once, when I was in Oxford in May. COME BACK AND VISIT AGAIN!

I'm successfully ignoring the thesis. I have a cardigan to finish, definitely more important than James McP. Before cool2hate's visit, I spent a few days in Special Collections reading 18th-century magazines, and among the Declaration of Independence (traitors!, so the general verdict) and expansion plans for a Edinburgh's north side, including a bridge across the north loch, I found 'Sightings of Mermaids' and 'Sow pigged 21 pigs in one litter'. I'm particularly fond of the pigging one - I think I shall adopt. Congratulations on twinning twins! Oh, your dog dogged puppies. Oh no, my cat kitted 8 kittens. Adorable

From Saunders again.

Dr Johnson (the fat dictionary guy): 'nor was he at all moved by a formal challenge from his adversary. Having purchased a formidable cudgel, six feet in length, and ending in a know three inches in diameter, he addressed Macpherson in the following terms.....'


A six feet cudgel with a three inch knob?

From my new all-time favourite, Bailey Saunders' "Life and Letters of James Macpherson" (1894)

'Bute himself attained a degree of unpopularity such as has seldom fallen to the lot of any English Minister; he was burnt in effigy, attacked in the streets, and at last compelled, for fear of his life, to hire a gang of butchers and prizefighters to protect him'

Butchers?!

Hair = gone

Thetrainline.com have refunded my ticket to/from Leeds in April. I am most delighted. This is the letter that inspired them to transfer £77.90:

Mercat House
1d Church Street
St Andrews
Fife
KY16 9NW

March 10th, 2007


Dear Sir / Madam,

I recently rather unwisely chose to travel by train from Leuchars to a conference in Leeds. The conference started at 4.30pm on March 9th, but unfortunately due to the signallers' strike I could not possibly get there using the trains I had bought tickets for via trainline.com (or indeed any trains from Leuchars or Edinburgh, see below):
8.44 Leuchars – Edinburgh (9.55)
10.05 Edinburgh – Leeds (13.08)

I was informed by someone on the national rain inquiry phone line that the first train leaving Edinburgh for Leeds would leave just after 3pm, and would get me to Leeds after 6pm. This was, of course, no use to me at all.

So I fortunately managed to get a lift with an acquaintance as far as Preston. I paid him 35 pounds for petrol etc., for which he will be happy to vouch should you require him to do so. I then got a train from Preston to Leeds (for £13.70), which got me to Leeds at around 4.30pm. I was slightly late for the beginning of the conference, but managed to catch most of the afternoon papers.

So far so good.

The return journey from Leeds to Leuchars, on March 10th,
19.05 Leeds – Edinburgh (22.13)
22.33 Edinburgh – Leuchars (23.50)

was delayed going out of Leeds by more than 20 minutes. This meant that despite being reassured by the conductor that I would make the connection in Edinburgh, I missed it by 2 minutes and so had to wait for the 23.10.

This wasn't all. From Leeds to Newcastle the train was filled with noisy drunk football supporters, who proceeded to shout football songs, obsceneties and other general unpleasantries for the whole duration of their journey (which lasted over an hour). And I mean at the top of their voices. Not to mention the smell of vomit that filled most of the train. There was no way of avoiding them – neither changing carriages nor turning my iPod up to full volume solved anything. The ticket collectors and other personell on board, when complained to, simply shrugged their shoulders and said there wasn't much they could do, and after all, 'they are only going to Newcastle, that's not that far, is it?'. Yes, it is.

To round things off, when attempting to use one of the toilets on board, on pressing the 'open' button, I was greeted by the sight of a lady and a gentleman in a what I can only describe as a compromising position. He had his trousers down by his ankles while she was busy peforming oral sex on him. This was a rather unpleasant sight.

I paid £77.90 for one unexisting and one intolerable journey.

This is unacceptable. I sincerely hope that you will reimburse me for the £126.60 I paid for this rather epic journey alltogether.




Yours sincerely





Kristin Ott

I have had an exciting week.

My aunt and cousins came to visit, and we did the whole Scottish Tourist thing. And then we went to Dundee, and the Queen was there! We were waiting in the crowd, and she came right past us!!!

... is what happens when you fall asleep in front of your camera-equipped computer...

First things first.
The computer. It's dead.
It turned itself off. Then water gushed out of it. It sizzled.
I've now got a shiny new white macbook. Pretty thing. With an inbuild camera!:

I'm slowly getting all my programmes back. I've not lost any data, but I can't get endnote or my tv programme to work. Which sucks. And I haven't put the Sims on yet.

Second. The pub of doom.
Isn't much fun at the moment. Still no discounts. And apparently we're now reliable if/when the tills are out at the end of the night? Is that legal? Wouldn't that cut into our minimum wage? I'll have a word with the citizen's advice bureau on Wednesday.

Third. Graduation week.
It's terribly busy in town. I'm not amused.

Fourth. Family.
My aunt and two cousins (14 + 16) are coming to visit next week. I'm mildly excited.

Fifth. Boys.
The boy had a couple of friends over for dinner. Fine. They brought meat, lots of it. And ate if off MY PLATES! And didn't open the windows afterwards. So the whole place smelled of it. Foul. Highly unamusing.

Sixth. Thesis.
I'm writing. A biographical chapter on Macpherson. I've got about 2500 words at the moment; it's due on Friday. There's no word-limit, though, so I guess I'll see how far I get.

Seventh. Computer.
I'm obsessed with photobooth. And so is Duckula:


Eighth. Knitting.
It's been way to long since I knitted anything. Sad.


That is all. I think.

I'm going mad.

My computer isn't working properly. Someone *cough Joseph cough* spilled tea on it. It seemed to like the two glasses of wine I spilled on it, but isn't too keen on tea. It now won't go to sleep, or open links properly, or open in non-safe mode. The trackpad and keyboard also aren't working. I can still use Word, which is fine.

The pub isn't working properly. Someone *cough new tempoary boss, aka her ladyship cough* spilled herself in it. It seemed to like being run by Scott, Theresa, Victoria and me, but isn't too keen on her ladyship. It now doesn't have most of the stock, or staff, or discounts. Apparently she is looking into why I paid so much in taxes, which is fine.